Frequently
Asked Questions About Engaged Encounter
What
is an Engaged Encounter Weekend?
Engaged
Encounter is an investment in the future - a weekend experience in which an
atmosphere is created that enables each couple to concentrate exclusively
on one another while free of the pressures and interruptions of daily life.
However, this weekend is not a recreational retreat. It is a program
designed to give each couple an opportunity to discuss honestly with each
other, in a face-to-face manner, their strengths and weaknesses, desires,
ambitions, goals, their attitudes about money, sex, family, their role in
the church and in society.
What
happens on a Weekend?
Through
a series of ideas presented by teams of married couples and a priest, deacon,
or sister, the engaged couples are stimulated to dialogue privately on all
aspects of married life, always from the viewpoint of their own
relationship. Couples are given the opportunity to question, examine and
deepen their relationship with each other. Through a series of writing and
sharing exercises the couples are challenged to explore many aspects of
their relationship in a much deeper, more honest way than they may have
before. Personal reflection and dialogue are the main emphasis of the weekend,
with the exception of meals and a few group activities interspersed.
What
is the cost of a weekend? How do we register?
The
total weekend cost is $299 per couple. This includes meals, lodging and
hand-outs. This amount is to be included with the registration form. Please
register 2-3 months prior to your desired weekend to ensure your date. You
can begin the registration process online and make
your checks payable to Catholic Engaged Encounter. $45 is non-refundable
and you must cancel two weeks prior to your weekend to get a refund.
Do
we have to stay all weekend?
Yes ...
the weekend begins on Friday evening at 8:00 p.m. and ends Sunday afternoon
about 3:30 p.m. Please arrange your schedule accordingly and select a
weekend in which you can make this full commitment.
Do
we have to say anything publicly?
No.
Engaged Encounter is non-threatening. You will be asked to introduce
yourself and your fiancé, but that is all. It is not group therapy.
Your privacy will be respected. It is not a counseling course, neither are
there formal lectures, nor is it based on group discussions. The weekend is
designed for private discussions between the couple. You concentrate on
your partner so much that you hardly notice the other couples present. The
presentations are given to the group as a whole, but your couple discussions
are private.
Why
does our priest make us go?
Well, actually,
you decided on it by deciding to become a Sacrament. I'll try to not wax
too theological. Catholics view the seven sacraments as a way of directly
encountering Jesus. Only two of the seven are sacraments of service,
directed towards the salvation of others: Matrimony and Holy Orders. Most
people understand that it takes years of preparation to become a priest.
There is a lot of overlap in what the Catholic Church expects of a priest
and a married couple. Most people do not think it takes any preparation to
be married. The reality is, it takes a lot to be
married, even more to become a sacrament. The forty four hours of the
weekend just scratch the surface of what it really takes. It is a start.
Does
the couple have to be Catholic?
No.
Although the weekend is designed for couples planning to be married in the
Catholic Church, it is open to all couples of any faith. It has been found
to be both beneficial and supporting of couples from differing faith
backgrounds.
What
should we pack and wear?
Separate
sleeping facilities are provided for men and women on the weekend.
Pack
separately and bring casual clothing that will be comfortable.
Bedding
is provided at Palisades, but we recommend bringing a sleeping bag for
Black Lake.
How
soon before the wedding should we attend our weekend?
Although
we are called Engaged Encounter, a couple does not need to be actually
engaged to attend a weekend. We recommend the "earlier the
better". As soon as you are engaged, or even considering engagement
that is the right time to attend a weekend. By attending early you can
discover areas of growth necessary in your relationship, determine if
engagement and marriage is right for you at this time (before becoming too
invested in the wedding preparations), and avoid the last minute hassles of
attending a weekend while trying to do everything else your wedding day
entails.
If
either of us have been married before can we still
attend an Engaged Encounter weekend?
Yes...the
weekend is for any couple, of any age, considering marriage.
Why
should we attend?
The
weekend experience offers each couple the insights, the tools and the
confidence to enrich their relationship and strengthen their love for one
another. They learn that good marriages don't just happen. They must be
developed. For many couples, this weekend is one of the most significant
experiences of their courtship.
How
does an Engaged Encounter enhance a marriage?
The
encounter weekend teaches a communication technique which permits each
couple to explore important areas of their relationship in a spirit of love
and understanding. By continuing the newly-acquired technique begun on the
weekend, husbands and wives continually grow closer together to live more
joyful and purposeful lives. While not an essential part of the experience,
the availability of a community of others who have shared the Weekend and
who share similar values provides a supportive environment for even further
growth.
Comments
about the Weekend
"Engaged
Encounter is the best marriage preparation program in communication for
engaged couples of any denomination in the U.S."
- Michael J McManus, author of the book, "Marriage
Savers", syndicated columnist in 100 newspapers and radio commentator.
"In
addition to pre-marital counseling, another wonderful way to eliminate the
unpleasant surprises of early married life is a program called Engaged
Encounter ... I strongly recommend Engaged Encounter to every couple
planning a wedding."
- Dr. James Dobson, author of "Love for a Lifetime",
founder of Focus on the Family
"We
believe that Engaged Encounter is an opportunity for engaged couples to
truly connect with one another on important topics and issues without being
distracted by daily life."
- Sheri and Bob Stritof, authors of "The Everything Great
Marriage Book", Marriage Guides at Marriage
at About.com
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Tacoma Catholic Engaged Encounter.
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